The day when I lost my shoes and thought maybe its a sign from the Universe…

It was July 2012 when I was one month into my college, very well reputed for its fest, ‘Malhar’. Being the dancing queen of Visakhapatnam, I was absolutely confident of making it to its Bollywood contingent in Mumbai.

Of course I didn’t prepare and just swayed and moved in that 1:37 slot (I still have the video to remind myself of the utter stupidity, which I still haven’t learnt from but I am on my way!). All the others had some kind of training and were part of Shiamak/ Terence or were just naturally THAT GREAT!

I didn’t make it.

I was broken. But I gathered myself up to take part in the UV Dance which I stuck to for two good years. We stood 2nd in my first year and didn’t make it in the next which affirmed my belief that maybe dancing isn’t really my thing.

UV Dance- Full of tricks and magic

So in my third year, I gave up on all my extra curricular and only did some selected fests to focus on getting a kickass GPA.

Which happened! (They say once you really set your heart on to something and work for it, you will get it).

And I went ahead to work for a year and got my soul sucked out but let’s not get there.

I quit that and decided to dance and give it a shot, wondering what could possibly go wrong? Just that I may not be very successful? But at least it would leave me with no regrets when I turn 30.

So my journey began mid 2016.

POINT BEING.

It was almost one and a half year back.

I lost my pink jazz shoes.

They were with me from the very beginning of my dance life at The Danceworx, Mumbai. Things were not going too great for me as I had just recovered from my knee injury and had just gotten back after a long break.

One year back I lost my entire dance bag.

And I still have the copy of the complaint because I lost EVERYTHING

For all the dancers out there, I can feel your heart break till here. Our bags? It is our world. From emergency food to shoes to clothes to deos to makeup to used clothes to diary, it is where we find our second home.

I thought through all these incidences to make one big picture and concluded that maybe this is a sign from Universe.

Maybe this is not really meant for me. Maybe I should just stick by it as a hobby or something I’d continue doing post my 9-5pm job just like old days.

This entire incident was reminded by my sister just a day before I was about to take my first workshop which by the way was SOLD OUT!

Check out the fun here – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DJmRyhDDqY

The next day of my workshop, I went back to my college to judge one of the events at Malhar, the very same place that broke my idea of myself down.

And I only wondered and was extremely grateful that I stayed on. I stayed on despite everything not making sense, despite never winning, despite never getting anything I wanted. Being treated as just a body in the room. That feeling of utter uselessness? Yea.

So if anyone out there is struggling and is just not able to see the light at the end of tunnel, I urge you to keep walking,keep at it, just keep believing and giving your best even on days when you just don’t want to leave your bed and just stay in to cry all night.

Dress up. Show up. Hustle in.

It will happen, things will change, you will grow, you will get what you deserve.

Be patient with yourself, the process and keep believing.

I share this only because I feel there is some value someone out there could make of it.

Quoting Hannah Gadsby, “Your resilience is your humanity.”

Stay on, fighter!

EverythingAtOnce